“The Nefarious Shoes!”
Here is Yin’s scary campfire story…….. It all began in a little Target store not too far from here. I was innocently walking through the shoe department. Softly, I heard a tiny voice calling “Yin, Yin, look at me! You KNOW you want me!” I looked up and cast my eyes upon the most gorgeous high heeled shoes I had ever seen in my entire life! I swore they had a heavenly glow to them! I searched for my size and to my dismay; they did not have my size. But I just had to have them so I bought the ones a half a size too big. After getting them home I realized I could not wear these gems of a shoe because my feet just slid around in them. Then I found out they were a discontinued style! So it began my mission to find the store that carried my size before they were gone forever. I had almost given up hope before the store right by my best friends work said the beautiful words “I have your size and I am holding them for you!” ((((( Hear the church bells chiming? ))))) My friend picked them up for me and like the universe was finally aligned, I had my precious heels upon my feet! Oh they were sexy! I was in love! I couldn’t wait to get them home and do a little strip tease for my husband! Later that night, he was sitting there in the chair anxiously awaiting his lap dance. I “kitty catted” in on my hands and knees purring cuz I was sporting some gorgeous new heels! I stood up as the music began; turned around to give him a view…… and stepped on his toe BREAKING it! He hooted and hollered but not for a good reason! I wrapped his toe and fixed him up. A few weeks later I decided to replay my strip tease being careful not to get near Yang’s feet. I made my entrance and was just about ready to give him his lap dance…… when my high heel shoe GASHED his leg open! Luckily I was able to bandage him up and he did not require any medical attention…… By now I am thinking that I have to be the worst dancer ever so a few days later I approached him again but with my old heels on. This time, the night went as planned…. Or should I say there was no bandaging him up! Every time I opened my closet, I saw those beautiful heels. I was hesitant to ever wear them again…….. But they were so cute! I took the chance and wore them again. I entered the room as confident as I could, considering the circumstances leading up until this night. Yang sat so bravely waiting for my approach; though I did see he had tucked his legs UNDER the chair this night! I began dancing, and I was dancing well. Things were going great! My confidence was soaring! Then I stepped on his toe AGAIN! I took those shoes off swearing they were cursed! NOTHING like this happens to normal people! I refused to wear them ever again and they sat in my closet for months. I was telling one of my friends at the time about my cursed shoes. She thought I was crazy and had to see them. She to thought they were sooooo beautiful! I said “If you are not scared then you can have them!” She happily took them home…….. About a month later I asked her “So how do you like the heels?” She said “You are right; they are a cursed pair of shoes! I left those things on the beach never looking back!” She literally just walked out of them leaving them behind. I did not ask for detail but she concurred…… they were a cursed pair of sexy heels!
MUHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!! Now sleep my pretties….. If you dare!
(Cue the banging drums at the end of the movie “Jumanji.”) Somewhere out in the ocean lurks a pair of heels waiting for its next victim! BOO!